gratitude Archives

A year for appreciating what matters

May 5, 2020

What have we been wasting our time doing?
Sherene Vismaya
Speaking of Jung Podcast

The year so far

In a year that memes have amusingly suggested was written by Stephen King, it has been one crisis after another. A series of emergencies in the form of destructive and damaging bushfires and floods ravaged Australia from late 2019. All fires in NSW were finally contained by 13 February.

By that time we were beginning to deal with the unfolding news of Coronavirus impacts in China beginning to spread. Since then the COVID-19 pandemic has unleashed a wave of unimaginable suffering and fear. To remain safe, we are all indoors and limiting our interactions as much as possible. Life as we know it has radically changed. Loved ones are out of reach physically and the death and sickness toll reflects the extensive impact on both an individual and collective level.

How are you doing?

So how are you doing in this year of immense challenge?

It is easy to focus on the worrying and fearful side of life and disaster. Media reports come at us relentlessly. Each of our situations is different and will influence how we respond. Our personality also plays a significant part. Whether we are introverted or extraverted is a huge influence on how being confined to our home more plays out for us.

For some, it has been a welcome relief from the workplace, commuting and too much social interaction, a time for reflecting within. Extraverts are typically finding it difficult not interacting socially given it is an important form of recharge: “Low-energy. I’m finding I don’t pandemic well.” Some personalities are more likely to thrive in isolation but all of us can find meaning in this time. I shared about what this time of COVID-19 and social distancing has been like for me as a person with INTJ preferences in this guest post.

Appreciating what matters

For me, this has been a year for appreciating what matters. Right from the get-go. Here are some of the ways that appreciating what matters has expressed itself in day to day life. I hope these thoughts inspire you too to tune into what matters.

Fresh air and sunshine

Those early weeks of 2020 were a stark reminder of the value of fresh air and sunshine. We experienced days of thick smoke with hazardous air quality levels but were fortunate to escape bushfires directly where I live.

As an asthmatic, I didn’t go out for weeks if I could avoid it. Summer in Australia is a time of outdoor living, sun, beach days and clear open skies. But not this year. We stayed inside most of the time at the height of our usually beautiful summers.

When we could finally get out into the fresh air and sunshine, it was with a new appreciation of its value. We could walk, swim, sit on the deck, look up at the open-hearted sky and relax.

In Australia while under COVID-19 conditions we have enjoyed mostly good weather and our level of restriction allows us to go out for exercise. We know from the 1918 Influenza epidemic that fresh air and sun can be a healing agent and natural disinfectant against disease. The value of being outdoors and in sunshine is so appreciated in new ways this year.

Home and community

In a brilliant podcast on the astrology and spirituality of the COVID-19 crisis, Jungian analyst Sherene Vismaya, tells that her spiritual teacher Amma told her followers in advance that something was going to happen in 2020. And they should all get to where they needed to be to hunker down.

The importance of where we are and a sense of home have become pivotal this year. I have so appreciated having a comfortable and stable home in a place that I love.

So many lost their homes in the bushfires. In recent times, many have had to travel in difficult circumstances to get home. Others have had to leave places that have been home for them while others have not been able to get home as they would like. It’s been a year for appreciating what matters about home, having a stable base and thinking about what home and community looks and feels like.

Friends and family

Family too has taken on new meaning as we have been contained to our smaller family bubble. It’s been wonderful to connect with family via Zoom and in other ways as we all spend more time isolated. In some ways, there has been more regular communication which is welcome. Missing loved ones and not being able to travel to see them or hug them is highlighted. I think we will come out of this time with a new appreciation for what matters in our family and relationship contexts.

Likewise, friends and community have been so supportive as we share our experiences and support each other. I have always valued my online friends and community. This time has bought that meaning to the fore.

Many of us gathered around Susannah Conway’s April Love 2020 hashtag challenge and continue in various challenges in May. I deeply appreciate my friends and community, whether the connection is mostly in person or online. This time has helped us to remember that it is connection that matters, however it is formed and shaped. Oh and I so appreciate anew those special times I have caught up with Quiet Writing friends overseas.

Animals

Witnessing the terrible destruction of so many animals in Australia during the bushfires was so upsetting. Our beautiful native animals – koalas, kangaroos, wombats, and so many others – unable to move fast enough and killed in great numbers. We often take it for granted that these animals will always be there. But the bushfire emergency highlighted that wide-scale death and destruction can mean species may become extinct. Additional funding started to flow, publicly and privately, to the work of native animal rescue and rehabilitation. There was so much more appreciation for their work in keeping these sacred animals alive.

It’s also been lovely to witness the role of companion animals in these crises. Being at home more and in our bubble, the animals we share our space with have taken on even more value and significance. New bonds have been forming with new animals finding forever homes to share a life with. And just the opportunity to cuddle up close is so comforting.

Beach, bush, yoga, walking and swimming

I live in an isolated area surrounded by beach and bush. These past months have highlighted the preciousness of both. Many of us have sought solace in wooded sanctuaries and parks nearby. The open space of the beach and the rhythm of the sea have been restorative energies.

I have used this time to sharpen my Personal Success Routines and ensure exercise is enshrined in my days. When we experienced the bushfires, I couldn’t get out to do what I loved most – to swim and walk. Even yoga classes were difficult with the poor air quality during the bushfires. It was safer to stay home. So when we could exercise outside eventually, they were like holy times and totally newly appreciated.

In this time of COVID-19, I started off hunkering down more than I needed to as I shared in my guest post on self-isolation recently. Eventually, I started going out more and getting back to walk and swim as I used to. Again, I missed yoga classes as they stopped due to social distancing. But I helped my yoga teacher get onto Zoom and offer her classes online. So in a wonderful win/win, I now can enjoy my yoga classes in my own home.

My new Personal Success Routine has been an opportunity to really up my commitment to what makes a difference with these new realisations of what matters. I have always been terrible at yoga home practice. But now I start the day with 30 minutes of yoga, a 45-minute walk on the beach and then an hour of Morning Pages, Tarot and Creative/Spiritual reading. I’ll share more on this soon. But it’s an embodiment in practice of appreciating what matters. And it is making ALL the difference.

Nourishing local organic food

Along with these new practices, I have found locals are working hard to source and help us access organic food locally. In my village, we are now able to source organic fruit and vegetables and more recently, organic meat and wild-caught fish. I was unaware of these options before this time. So now I am enjoying the freshest of produce that last for a long time and only driving 3 minutes up the road to get it.

I am so thankful for those seeking local organic alternatives and helping others to enjoy them too. We swap recipes on our Facebook group and share a joy of what matters when it comes to eating in healthy ways.

Reading and personality type

Hasn’t reading come into its own in these times? Always an avid reader, I have savoured it all the more as I have had to stay inside more. I have chosen novels for most of this time, enjoying historical fiction, especially by Australian women authors. You can always check in with what I am reading here over at Goodreads.

Finding it hard to concentrate initially in this time of bushfire and pandemic, I am enjoying catching up more now on my consolidating reads and personality reference material as I shape up some new offerings and material. Personality type insights have been a key tool in negotiating this time and my reactions. I have shared personality insights online, via this guest post and via 1:1 and group coaching.

Quiet Writing and working from home

And of course, it’s been a time for quiet writing, for going deeper in my business, my coaching, offerings and writing. I deeply appreciated that over time I have built an online business coaching, writing and working from home. Pursuing multiple streams of income through a combination of property investment and development, coaching, online courses and writing books, it’s been an affirmative time for knowing this is the right strategy. It’s been a time of digging deep to work out how to share with others how they can work on what matters in their lives.

How are you appreciating what matters at this time?

So that is my thoughts on appreciating what matters at this time. It took me ages to write this post as I reflected deeply on these past months and what they have taught me. I would love to hear what you are appreciating as mattering and making a difference for you now.

What are you appreciating more deeply?

What matters for you – what realisations have you had?

What have you missed?

What new practices would you love to cultivate?

What transitions are you seeking?

Transition Coaching

I am a transition coach and work with women seeking deeper meaning and purpose and change in their lives. If you would like support working with the energies and challenges that this time has brought to the surface, I’d love to work with you.

Coaching with me can help you navigate these times so you can make the most of what matters.

Head over to my Work with me page for more information:

Work With Me

Or head straight over to book a Discovery Call – love to talk with you and support your stepping into this time more positively!

Book a Discovery Call

2 Comments

creativity inspiration & influence personality and story

How to know and honour your special creative influences

September 4, 2017

How we choose to pay attention, and relate to information and each other shapes who we become, shapes our creative destiny and, in turn, shapes our experience of the world.

Maria Popova, Networked Knowledge and Combinatorial Creativity

Here are some thoughts and tips on honouring our special creative influences, connecting them with our passions and taking them forward into new unique endeavours.

Knowing and honouring our creative influences is how we connect with our legacy and passions and take them forward. A key theme in my ebook ‘36 Books that Shaped my Story‘ is an exploration of how creative influences shape us, our world and our own creations.

’36 Books’ goes through a personal journey of reviewing the books that have impacted me over the chronology of my life. I selected key books of influence and ordered them into a sequence. Then I revisited each book and honoured its wisdom and learning, reflecting on the narrative as it unfolded in my life.

The creative influence of what we love

I’ve always been acutely aware of creative influence and how each book I read makes some kind of impact on me. Perhaps it’s my INTJ personality and that mix of Introverted Intuition and Extraverted Thinking; or maybe it’s my language and literature background. But from a young age, I’ve always read deeply, kept notes and chronicled influences – whether it be music, the written word, images or art. Many of us seek ways to capture what influences us, what speaks to us, what leaves a lasting impression in ways that make sense for us.

Think of the musicians or writers, books or songs, that we love. Why of all the musicians and writers do some speak to us so directly and passionately? Why does Daphne Du Maurier – her books, where she lived, everything about her – capture my heart so much? When I hear The Cure’s ‘A Forest’, why do I get all shivery each time I even though I’ve listened to it many times? Why do I cry every time I hear ‘What a Wonderful World’? And why does the song, ‘Witchita Lineman’ do things to the top of my head that I can’t even explain?

And visually, why do artist Edward Hopper’s austere landscapes and solitary figures connect with me so intensely? Why do I feel like I exactly understand ‘The Scream’ by Edvard Munch? And why does the light in Ansel Adam’s photographs bring me tears?

I guess you could say I’m just sensitive. But all of us have had that feeling of reading, listening, seeing and engaging with all of our senses, witnessing something deep, visceral and connected with an artist, writer or place. Those influences stay with us and they gather, coalesce and merge into something unique within us, connecting with other aspects of our personality and passions.

Combinatorial creativity

In her fabulous Creative Mornings talk, Networked Knowledge and Combinatorial Creativity, Maria Popova explores the notion of creativity as a combination of influences. This is something I’ve long felt and honoured. So it was beautiful to read Popova’s piece articulating this and curating her own influences and thoughts on this concept.

Popova introduces us to the idea of florilegium, from the 14th century. These were:

compilations of excerpts from other writings, essentially mashing up selected passages and connecting dots from existing texts to illuminate a specific topic or doctrine or idea. The word comes from the Latin for “flower” and “gather.”

Popova provides examples of where knowledge or skill in one sphere influenced and sharpened another. For example, novelist Vladimir Nabokov was a butterfly collector which he believed helped with creating detail and precision in his writing.

There are a few concepts tied up in this idea of combinatorial creativity. One is that different areas of knowledge and influence can come together to impact on each other in new ways. Another is that nothing is completely new from the ground up, but more a consequence of influences coming together and how we integrate or collate them in our unique way. And a third is that all that connected knowledge and skill creates a body of mastery we can call on to connect the dots further into new creations.

Books, narrative and story connections

I explore this concept in my ‘36 Books‘ analysis of the books that have impacted me and my narrative:

And story is the shape the words make – the narrative we weave through the body of work that we create through career, our creative endeavours and our passions. This story is unique – no one has read the same books as you in the same way; no one has the same life experiences as you; and you are the only one to combine your passions and experiences in the way that you do.

I focus on books in my exploration but that becomes a filter of so much more. The books we choose to read at any time, their influence on us, the ones that make a huge personal impact and the interaction of this with our context and story, all play critical roles. It’s fascinating to step back and reflect on the books that really moved you and why; the ones you keep close by and why they are always there.

Sage Cohen, whose essay ‘Honor Your Lineage’ in ‘Fierce on the Page‘ ignited my ’36 Books’ journey, talks about books as teachers. Just as special teachers and mentors in our lives impact on us and leave a legacy we take forward, so books are special teachers whose messages we need to honour.

How do you honour your influences?

So how do you honour your influences? I am a big believer in acknowledging my influences and the impact of others on me. I think it’s important to take the time to acknowledge who has influenced and helped you.

’36 Books’ is a deep analysis of this around the books that have shaped my story. This is something I did also on the post My Seven Stars many years ago which thanked the role models who started me on this journey. It was a feature also of my welcome post when I relaunched my blog as Quiet Writing nearly a year ago. My regular Creative and Connected series here acknowledges the influence of what I’ve listened to and read as well as engaged in via social media. It’s a deep value of mine to acknowledge your influences and their inspiration.

I also believe strongly in acknowledging other’s work you are referring to, drawing from or weaving into your own. Perhaps it’s my academic background with all those essays and bibliographies and references annotated. Though in the workplace too, I would always acknowledge the contribution and influence of others. I’d talk about the outcomes of projects as the collation of the team’s influence as much as any leadership on my part. Such is my antenna about valuing influence.

Tips for knowing, honouring and acknowledging your influences

So here are a few practical tips for knowing, honouring and acknowledging your influences:

1 Take the time to identify your influences:

Pull the books off the shelves that are special influences, collect them and find ways to honour them by writing about them, connecting their messages and spending time listening to what they have brought to you.
Collect influences from different genres in your life (music, books, movies) and see how they connect to identify the common themes in your life.
Identify the people (eg famous figures, online connections, teachers, family, friends) who have had the most influence on you. Think about the impact and why it was important.

2 Thank your influencers:

Publicly or privately (or both), take the time to acknowledge and thank the people who have influenced you for their contribution to your journey.
We don’t always know when we are having an influence. Taking the time to tell others of their impact can be something that buoys their creativity for their next effort. It gives strength to their work and channels more energy for their contribution.
Sometimes we might not be able to thank people directly. But show gratitude for their work in some way such as acknowledging sources in a written piece. This allows others to learn from them and integrate it into their own creative journey.

3 Acknowledge influence and the source of ideas in your own work

If you quote someone else’s words or reference someone else’s thoughts, make sure it’s properly and correctly attributed.
Don’t claim others work as your own. Honour the creator by quoting and attributing their words correctly.
Don’t be afraid to mention who has influenced you because it’s all part of that rich combination of ideas and dots that brings new connections to life.

4 Wear your influences with pride and originality

Boy George was a judge on the ‘The Voice’ television program in Australia recently. He said to one of the contestants after their performance: “You need to wear your influences – they make you who you are.” As you connect the dots of your influences in new ways, wear them in ways only you can to create your unique work in the world.
Just as we can dress creatively, putting together different styles like modern and vintage, wear your unique influences confidently and proudly. Make your own Style Statement.
Look for connections, common themes and even the tension of opposites as sources of creativity. In this way, you can create your personal signature in how you work and present yourself.

5. Work through jealousy and envy

A huge killer of combinatorial creativity is feeling jealous about the work of others that draws from similar influences. You have a great idea and then you see someone doing a very similar thing. You can feel gutted and overcome with envy.
Work through this so your unique perspective is not lost. You might have very similar sets of passions and influences to someone else. But the way they are blended with your unique personality and experiences will always be individual. So find your own way and have confidence in your unique remix and personal style.
You could connect with the person and celebrate their strengths. You could share their work, see how you can work together and find new ways to co-create from these shared influences. Acknowledge the envy and work from a sense of abundance, not limited thinking.

Have the courage to do your own work

At the end of the day, we also need to have the courage to do our own work. The best way we can take all those antecedents and influences forward is to honour them in new creations. Finding ways to identify our special perspective, our niche, our unique way of working is a creative act all of its own.

As Steven Pressfield reminds us in The War of Art:

Creative work is not a selfish act or a bid for attention on the part of the actor. It’s a gift to the world and every being in it. Don’t cheat us of your contribution. Give us what you’ve got.

Get your copy of ’36 Books that Shaped my Story: Reading as Creative Influence’

Just head to the link below and ’36 Books’ will be with you soon! It’s a 94-page reflection on the creative influence of what we read. It takes you on a journey through my own influences. Find out which 36 books influenced me and why!

Get your copy of 36 Books that Shaped my Story

What are your creative influences?

Ok, so what or who has that visceral effect on you – book, song, movie, author, singer, artist? What has had a huge impact on you and how has it influenced you? Would love to hear!

You can share in the Comments or visit Quiet Writing on Instagram or Facebook.

Keep in touch and interact with the growing Quiet Writing community. There are regular posts on intuition, influence, creativity, books, productivity, writing, voice, introversion and personality type.

If you enjoyed this post, please share via your preferred social media channel – links are below.

gratitude

A year for appreciating what matters

The year so far

How are you doing?