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10 useful secrets from 10 years of blogging

May 29, 2020

On 2 May 2010, I hit publish on my first blog post. It was my first blog, Transcending, the forerunner to Quiet Writing and integrated within it. I’d been enjoying and studying other bloggers. I was drawn to writing and publishing my own blog as a way of finding my voice and sharing my story.

It felt very scary to push publish on that first Welcome post. I described the feeling in this post:

I’m ready. That day feels like a threshold, stepping into something so wide open My voice, suddenly reaching out beyond the room, beyond the page, beyond paper and pen to I don’t know where.

I learnt so much that day. That not everybody is watching. It’s not as vulnerable as you think. There’s power in the gathering of words and ideas, of images and curating yourself in this way.

And I’ve learnt through the 10 years that my blog is a guide and witness to my emerging journey and transition to deeper creativity.

So here are 10 blogging secrets encapsulating what I’ve learnt from 10 years of blogging!

1. Not everyone is watching or caring

Especially in the early stages, you think everyone is watching and everyone will see what you are writing. You think they will all be judging you especially if they are from another part of your life. One where they don’t see this side of you, like work colleagues or family.

The truth is you are more likely to find yourself howling in the wind with very few people reading initially. It’s not as vulnerable as you might think.

2. Harness the value of howling into the wind

You write as if your life depends on it but laugh to yourself at the fact that virtually no one is reading.

The value of howling into the wind

Yep, that’s the irony of it all. So concentrate on the value of the howling:

Perhaps hearing your own voice reflected back in the waves of air. Perhaps knowing that just sending out these words and images into the atmosphere might lead to something larger like a future you have dreamed about. Perhaps it is about hoping you can in some way impact positively on others as others have impacted on you.

Thinking beyond yourself and your own writing to the impact you can have on others is a powerful place to focus.

blogging tips

3. Know it’s a fantastic way to work out what you want to say

If not for blogging, there is so much I would never have worked out. We can write for ourselves but writing for an audience, shaping our thoughts for others, takes us to another level. As with any writing, we discover what we want to say as we write.

I didn’t know exactly what these insights on blogging from 10 years’ experience would be until I started writing. Of course, I had an inkling and a few ideas to start with. But the act of writing this post gives form and shape to the learning from 10 years of blogging.

Crafting these thoughts and remembering the feelings is a powerful way to tap into what’s important about blogging. Sharing this with you helps us both celebrate the power of writing and not feel so alone. And hopefully, these blogging secrets and insider tips from 10 years will inspire you on your blogging journey!

4. Our core themes are often surprisingly consistent

It’s amazing looking back at my first words on Transcending 10 years ago:

‘Transcending’ is an exploration of the ways that we rise, overcome, climb across and pass beyond.

It celebrates the extraordinary power of the ordinary self in creativity, writing, in love, in the workplace and in our family contexts, such as our family history and what it means…

Join me in this journey as it unfolds. Some of the areas I hope to explore are:

  • writing as a way of transcending and moving through
  • my own creative journey as a writer
  • poetry and the shapes and structures we find to manage our emotions
  • music and images as vehicles for experiencing and managing feelings
  • family history and its stories of how we connect and experience life
  • constructive leadership behaviours and strategies
  • reading and reflections on transcending
  • connections with other writers and thinkers on this theme in all its guises

What is fascinating is that not so much has changed. The key themes are there. Transcending has become more about transitions. Creativity, reading, writing, leadership (self-leadership), personal journeys and resilience are all there.

Blogging teaches us that our key themes and body of work might find new guises but are remarkably consistent over time. That’s because a blog is a curation of ourselves, a constellation of our passions and desires. The threads weaving through will inevitably be familiar as we search in more and deeper ways for meaning and purpose.

blogging tips

5. It’s the best way I know for hearing your own voice

I have heard my own voice in clearer ways here on Quiet Writing and on Transcending than I have anywhere else. I know the voice of my Morning Pages and the voice of my social media presence. But when I hit my stride here on the blog especially when writing about intuition, writing, books and the passions over my lifetime, I hear my voice sing.

Having an audience and a loyal community of readers who value how I write and what I write about helps immensely. Thank you so much to you precious people! The formatting in WordPress – the structure, the typing, the neat paragraphs helps my personality find comfort and familiarity in this safe space I’ve carved online.

More than anything, it’s the showing up post by post, week by week, month by year, year by year that helps me hear and shape my voice and work out what I really want to say and how.

6. Consistency helps, blogging always welcomes us

I have made great progress at times when I’ve blogged consistently, showing up, breaking through barriers, tuning into my themes and audience. Then there were really tough times in my life when writing consistently was too hard. I didn’t feel whole enough to shape the words or share them for whatever reason.

My blogging practice was born of grief following the death of my brother in 2007 and my father soon after in 2009. Blogging helped me work through this grief and seek more creative ways of living and working. But in trying to make the shift to a self-sustaining creative life and still fit my work-life in, work sometimes took over. I just couldn’t surface from it or carve out enough space and time.

I’ve learnt that blogging always invites us back when we are ready. And the art of blogging helps to invite more space and time for creativity within ourselves. Like a mirror, it helps us see where our lives have become too busy, where creativity could be a welcome addition. That eventual return to blogging can be like a homecoming and our blog waits, welcoming us with open arms when we return.

blogging tips
Photo by Suzy Hazelwood from Pexels

7. Blogging is not for everyone

Through my coaching work, I have learnt that surprisingly, blogging is not for everyone. Clients have started out with coaching goals around blogging only to find that the best outcome was not to blog. What? I am so passionate about blogging, I find it hard to believe. But we are all different people with our own personality preferences and likes and dislikes. And it’s perfectly fine if blogging is not for you now or any time.

Blogging takes time and commitment and the return on the investment of your time is not always immediate. So consider whether you need a blog. It’s a form of content to help people connect with you and your work. But there are other ways to do this such as micro-blogging on social media, vlogging (video logging), using IG Stories/IGTV, Facebook Live and podcasting. It’s not an either/or. Consider what works best for you and your preferred ways of creating content and connecting. Think too of what skills you want to grow.

I encourage you though to keep your mind and heart open to see if blogging is for you. Try it and see what it turns up for you. Think about what you are expecting from blogging and if the return on investment over the long term might very well be worth the while.

8. Working out your blogging content pillars helps immensely

One of the biggest challenges with blogging is knowing what to write about and coming up with content ideas. The best way I have found to keep inspired and organised is to work out your blogging content pillars. These are the 6-8 content pillars for your business or creative focus that can also function as blog categories and your social media content focus. This gives you consistency across your life, business and creative profile.

Then write key blog content pillar articles or cornerstone blog posts that define your business, skills and focus. See Yaro Starak’s free Blog Profits Blueprint for further tips on this.

This is an ongoing journey. In my year of Consolidating, I am currently realigning what I write about to my categories and pillars. I know this structure will help me. I’m working on a content bank in Trello so I always have a list of ideas ready and blog posts in various stages of development. That way, I can keep blogging with enjoyment, purpose and ease and see where it fits with my overall creative and business life.

blogging tips

9. Stretch yourself by guest blogging for others and inviting people to guest blog for you

You can do more than just blog for yourself on your own platform. Going beyond this helps you grow as a writer, build your networks and community and connect with others.

Guest blogging for others is a fantastic way to stretch your writing wings and share your expertise. It’s something I’ve focused on to grow my blogging skills. You can find links to the guest posts I’ve written for others in my featured writing. Here are some examples:

Self-Isolation Is A Challenge For All Of Us. Yes, Even Introverts.

Stepping up through fear

How to be inclusive of introverts and extraverts in recruitment practices

Extraverted Intuition – Imagining the Possibilities

Each of these guest posts made me step up in new ways to my writing, share my knowledge and expertise and reach new audiences as well.

I also chose to open Quiet Writing up to guest posts on Stories of Wholehearted Living. It was time to hear voices and experiences other than my own. Gathering stories from women about their journey to more wholehearted living has been one of the most exciting aspects of ten years of blogging.

These wonderful women generously shared their stories with the Quiet Writing community. Working with each of these writers to craft, shape and edit their story in a blog format, I imparted my encouragement, wisdom and experience along the way. The Wholehearted Stories authors also imparted their encouragement, wisdom and experience for the benefit of us all. You too can guest post on Quiet Writing and share your story – the invitation is open to you here.

10. Investigate Voice First ways of working

The last of my blogging secrets and tips points towards the future and opening up easier ways of working. You can write by using your voice first. For example, you can speak into your phone and convert it to text via the built-in microphone or use an app like Google Keep. A Dictaphone linked to Dragon software is another option. If you are a person who finds it easier to talk than write, this might be for you. It’s also a skill worth developing to save time and wear and tear on the body.

Moreover, this is the way of the future. With more voice-activated search technologies now available, it is a way for people to find your work. It also makes it more accessible for people who choose to listen rather than to read and for those with visual impairment. Learn more about voice first in this Creative Penn podcast. For so many reasons, it’s a goal for Quiet Writing to be more voice first, making audio versions of blog posts and more. You can check out my Create Your Story Podcast and also the audiobook of Wholehearted: Self-leadership for women in transition.

Next steps + further reading

So I hope that you enjoyed my blogging secrets from 10 years of blogging. It’s been an amazing ride and blogging has given me so much. I hope that you can also invest time and energy in blogging to enjoy its rich rewards.

And here are a few more posts on blogging from the 10 year history of Transcending and Quiet Writing:

Making blogging easier: a note to self

Writing my first blog post – my recollections

How to write a blog post when you have almost no time

Blogging and work

Practical tools to increase writing productivity

personality and story work life

How to be more aware of the value of cognitive diversity in the workplace

April 14, 2018

This post shares recent insights from neuroscience, neurodiversity and the ABC TV show, Employable Me, about the importance of valuing cognitive diversity.

neuroscience

Insights from neuroscience and neurodiversity show us there are many ways to approach tasks, teamwork, workplace projects, and recruitment solutions. Valuing cognitive diversity in personality type, cognitive preferences, and brain makeup is an area that has had limited attention in the past. Enlightened workplaces, leaders and human resources practitioners are realizing there is much to be gained from considering these issues and strategies that embrace cognitive diversity.

Recent insights from neuroscience and neurodiversity help inform these approaches. Case studies of job seekers and employer perspectives in the ABC’s Employable Me series also highlight the valuable outcomes when cognitive strengths rather than weaknesses are the focus.

In this post, I share:

  • insights from my recent WorkSearch guest post exploring this issue
  • learning from neuroscience workshops with UCLA professor and author, Dario Nardi, including the experience of brain-imaging via EEG
  • the experience of watching ABC’s Employable Me series and reflecting on jobseeker experiences and employer attitudes.

WorkSearch guest post on cognitive diversity

I’ve recently explored these issues in detail in a guest post over at WorkSearch. In This is how to be more aware of the superior value of neurodiversity in the workplace, I discuss the following:

  • difference as a source of strength and heterogeneity in the workforce as a value to be embraced rather than a challenge to be overcome;
  • the value of cognitively diverse and inclusive workplaces;
  • insights from neuroscience about the value of recognizing the strengths and weaknesses of different cognitive functions;
  • insights from neurodiversity about valuing the diversity of different brain types and the special gifts they can bring;
  • some of the ways diversity based on personality and cognitive preference can work for us and for organizations; and
  • ways to identify your “team’s brain” to see the natural cognitive terrain it covers and whether it is diverse or not.

Here is the article – so head over to WorkSearch and have a read. Welcome your thoughts and feedback here!

This Is How To Be More Aware Of The Superior Value Of Neurodiversity In The Workplace

Learnings from neuroscience workshops with Dr Dario Nardi

I had the pleasure of attending two workshops with award-winning UCLA professor and author, Dario Nardi, as part of the proceedings of the Australian Association for Psychological Type Conference in Sydney in October 2017. Dario Nardi’s work focuses on the neuroscience of personality and using brain imaging via EEG technology to see how the brain works as it undertakes different activities. I had the opportunity to see brain imaging in action and also to undergo my own brain imaging session. Here is a picture of my brain in action!

cognitive diversity

The EEG and aligned computer analysis help to show the relationship between the brain and tasks. It shows the brain regions that link together as networks and which regions of the brain we favour. The research also shows the links between brain activity and personality type, especially the eight cognitive functions described by Carl Jung in the 1920’s.

It’s fascinating to see how the rich framework that Jung developed on the basis of conversations with patients is now borne out in ways we can directly observe via technology.

As Dario Nardi says in his book, Our Brains in Colour:

The brain is like an orchestra that usually plays our favourite songs.

cognitive diversity

Through the workshops, we worked to identify:

  • the regions of the brain we personally rely on most
  • how this links to personality type and cognitive preferences
  • cognitive diversity within our workshop group and different ways to process information
  • insights from learning other ways to process information
  • brain-savvy coaching approaches for ourselves and others to embrace cognitive diversity
  • the value of drawing on non-preferences to strengthen cognitive resources and new habits
  • how we can ‘prime’ ourselves to learn new ways of extending into unfamiliar cognitive areas
  • how this conscious development of cognitive diversity is a form of self-leadership.

self-leadership

The value of cognitive diversity in workplace approaches

An underlying theme in all of this is the value of cognitive diversity. A driving issue for me based on my own workplace experiences is that a focus on the neurotypical or dominant paradigm can disadvantage some people.

An example is the typical approaches to recruitment and talent acquisition that favour interviews as a dominant mode of selection. As any introvert knows, this type of approach is unlikely to bring out the best in them as an applicant. In two posts for WorkSearch, I’ve explored this issue from the perspective of both applicants and recruiters:

How to make the most of the right recruitment opportunities as an introvert

This is what happens when recruiters make inclusion mistakes (and how to avoid it)

In these pieces, I’ve encouraged a more inclusive approach to recruitment processes to enable all people to bring their best skills to bear. This also means recruiters are more likely to get the best person for the job without the recruitment process itself being a barrier or filter.

cognitive diversity

Neurodiversity and perspectives from Employable Me

It’s been fascinating to watch the first two episodes of the ABC’s excellent Employable Me series in this light. This series focuses on job seekers with disabilities and how they seek to show their capabilities. It follows people with neuro-diverse conditions such as autism, OCD & Tourette syndrome in their search for meaningful work. Drawing on science and insights from experts, the extraordinary and unique skills of the job seekers are explored.

It makes insightful viewing as the jobseekers’ deeper strengths are identified and as they seek to find a place in society where they can contribute. This is enhanced by employers taking an approach that values the individual and diversity. It means looking at options like removing barriers such as irrelevant interviews in favour of the hands-on demonstration of skills.

With the support of workplaces and employers that value cognitive diversity, the job seekers showcase their exceptional skills. This includes incredible short-term memory skills such as remembering 15 random words in sequence after hearing them once, forensic ability to identify errors in computer games coding and encyclopaedic geographical knowledge. Matching these outstanding skills to the right workplace means working positively through potential barriers.

It was refreshing to hear job seeker Tim’s new employer say that a number of their computer games analysts are autistic as they have a special gift for the task. Fabulous also that as an employer they have shifted from interviews to the practical demonstration of skills. This is because interviews are not helpful for understanding the strengths of job seekers with autism. Job seeker Tim, who found it incredibly hard to travel to work because of the practical and sensory challenges, can do this work from home.

More than one way to do it

As Larry Wall, creator of the Perl open software program, quoted in Steve Silberman’s history of autism, Neurotribes says:

There is more than one way to do it.

This has been my learning as I have taken a deeper dive into cognitive diversity from a neuroscience and neurodiversity perspective. It’s easy to think our way is the best or the only way. Easy also to view traditional approaches to problems or situations as the only options.

I have found from these experiences that being open to cognitive diversity in ourselves and in others can be:

  • a form of personal growth and self-leadership
  • an insight into our strengths and gifts and those of others
  • a way of developing our non-preferred cognitive functions so we can be more well-rounded
  • a way of being more open-hearted and mindful of the skills and experiences of others
  • a deeper way to see our interactions, teams and workplaces as rich sources of cognitive and interpersonal learning.

This enables us and others to contribute more fully to society as we personally grow and develop. And this means richer and more cognitively diverse experiences and outcomes for us all.

I hope you enjoy the insights from reading this piece and also the links within it. I look forward to sharing my deep-dive personality type offerings with you soon to enrich your self-knowledge and cognitive diversity.

neuroscience

Keep in touch & free ebook on the ’36 Books that Shaped my Story’

All of my featured writing can be found here.

You can download my free 95-page ebook on the 36 Books that Shaped my Story – just sign up with your email address in the box to the right or below You will also receive updates from Quiet Writing and its passions. This includes personality type, coaching, creativity, writing, tarot and other connections to help express your unique voice in the world.

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If you enjoyed this post, please share via your preferred social media channel – links are below.

You might also enjoy:

Your body of work – the greatest gift for transition to a bright new life

Personality skills including how to be the best you can be as an introvert in recruitment

Shining a quiet light – working the gifts of introversion

introversion personality and story wholehearted stories

My wild soul is calling – a wholehearted story

August 28, 2017

wild soul

This guest post from Elizabeth Milligan reminds us that listening to our wild soul calling can provide important clues to a more wholehearted life.

This is the second guest post in our Wholehearted Stories series on Quiet Writing. I invited readers to consider submitting a guest post on their wholehearted story. You can read more here – and I’m still keen for more contributors if you are interested. 

Quiet Writing celebrates self-leadership in wholehearted living and writing, career and creativity. This community of voices, with each of us telling our own story of what wholehearted living means, is a valuable and central part of this space. In this way, we can all feel connected on our various journeys and not feel so alone. Whilst there will always be unique differences, there are commonalities that we can all learn from and share to support each other.

I am honoured to have my online friend, Elizabeth Milligan, as a ‘Wholehearted Stories’ contributor. Elizabeth and I met through Susannah Conway’s e-course, Blogging From the Heart, years ago now, and have followed and celebrated each other’s journeys ever since.

My sincere thanks to Elizabeth for the contribution of her beautiful personal story to Quiet Writing, including the stunning images from her journey. It’s a journey that has taken her to many new and rediscovered places – read on to find out more!

My wild soul is calling

It’s difficult to say where my story of living a more wholehearted life started.  There was no one dramatic, life-changing event.  It was more of an ongoing unease and restlessness that prodded me awake at night through my twenties and thirties.  A gentle tap-tapping, a whispering breeze, a far-off voice calling my name.  I tried to listen and follow my heart.  I travelled widely and far afield but I never found an answer.  I kept on moving.  I switched careers, jobs and countries more times than I can recall, but still something was missing.  Depression hit me.  Anger.  Despair.  Why couldn’t I just be?  Why the restlessness?  The continual searching?

I arrived at my forties and decided it was stability I needed.  I stopped moving, got a job, met a man.  For a time I was able to breathe.  The elation and euphoria of a new love blotted out all other concerns.  Or did it?  Soon the question of our combined futures was gently raised, and it turned out we were both looking for something other than the lives we were leading.  Ten months into our new life together we jumped ship, left the city and ran away to the countryside.  The plan was to use our savings, take a sabbatical of sorts from life and work in the city and do something more creative with our days, surrounded by nature.  We found a housesit in the middle of nowhere in rural France, gave notice on our jobs, put our stuff into storage, and set off.

Doing the groundwork

It sounds like this was all a smooth transition, but in reality there was a lot going on before any of it could happen.  I’m talking about mind-set and subtle changes that take place through conversation, discussion, self-questioning and research.  Where ideas and thoughts start to become viable possibilities.  I had been listening to Danielle LaPorte’s Fire Starter Sessions and was wanting to take a more proactive approach to my life based on my true values.  I had made my first vision board and stuck it on the wall opposite my bed so it was the first thing I saw in the morning and the last thing at night.  I wasn’t really sure what I was looking for but I was certain I was looking for something different.

wild soul

I felt like I had spent the best part of my life as an observer and onlooker.  When was I going have the starring role in my own life rather than a sad, out-of-camera cameo?  I could see very clearly where I was in life and to most people, this probably looked like a pretty good place.  A good job in a nice French city, a leisurely cycle to work, regular meetings in Paris, outdoor markets for shopping, and beautiful city parks or the hills of Beaujolais for weekend jaunts.  But in reality, my job was boring me to tears.  It was not who I was and it was not what I wanted.  I felt guilty for not wanting it but I just couldn’t do it anymore.

I realised things had to change and I had become aware of other options.  Instead of constantly trying to quash the panic and feeling of wanting to run, like I’d been doing for so long, it was time to listen to my gut and break free.

Taking a risk and breaking free

So we took a risk, threw everything up in the air and allowed the universe to catch us.  Ever since I read the books of Oriah Mountain Dreamer many moons ago I have wanted to trust in the power of the universe, to open up and surrender to something bigger and infinitely more powerful than we will ever be.  This was my chance.  I knew that we were going on a journey but I didn’t realise, and still don’t fully understand, the long-term implications of that decision we made one warm summer’s evening in our tiny French apartment.

Before arriving at our housesit, an isolated farmhouse sitting alone in over one hundred acres of rambling fields, I had no plan of what I would do every day.  I wanted to see how things would unfold.  I was not going to force myself to do anything.  I was craving unstructured days and freedom and this was the perfect opportunity.

Finding my inner child

Being completely free with no commitments, no expectations from anyone, and no structure in the day is rather strange at this age.  I can see how some people may be uncomfortable with this, but for me it was a wonderful and decadent regression.  I felt like a child left behind in a secret world after all the adults had gone home.

I found a pair of wellington boots that fit me and spent my days in wellingtons and shorts trudging around the fields spotting the local wildlife.  Deer, hares, coypu, egrets, foxes, wild boar, although these I never saw.  I only heard them some nights when the moon was full, calling across the fields with their terrifying blood-curdling screams.  I chopped wood for the fire and foraged for herbs and fruit, making nettle soup, elderberry jam and mountains of quince chutney.  I made friends with the barn owl that lived in the unused kitchen chimney, and the bats that flew around at night, often through the open windows.  I watched the sunrise in the morning and the sunset at night and every full moon I would run into the field behind the barn to catch the first glimpse on the horizon.

wild soul

Feeling like I was finally in my true environment, I became re-acquainted with the little girl inside and realised with relief that she hadn’t left me after all.  She had just been hiding and waiting for the right conditions to show herself again.  As a child I loved cycling and I had forgotten what fun it was to cycle around quiet country lanes.  Using bikes we found in the barn we started cycling to the shops for our groceries instead of driving.  When the weather was warm we would stop off and swim in the river on the journey home.  I felt alive.  I felt in touch with this beautiful planet we live on.  I had rediscovered a missing piece of the puzzle.

Rewriting my story

The next piece of the puzzle I found was regarding personality type.  I was in an online group of women and one week a discussion about personality type came up.  This was new for me so I did an online test and identified as personality type INFP on the Myers-Briggs scale.

This means nothing if you don’t know about this scale.  But what the test results revealed was that I was an introvert.  I had never considered whether I was extrovert or introvert before but the realisation felt like the penny dropping.  I suddenly saw my past with startling clarity.  I had felt like an outsider my whole life.  An observer.  Someone who kept their distance.  I thought I was maybe anti-social.  I had been called shy and quiet at best, and aloof and stand-offish at worst.  Here was something saying I was perfectly normal and not only that, other people felt the same way too.

I realised that if the stories I had been telling myself were no longer true then everything could change.  If I nurtured my introvert qualities and stopped trying to be extrovert like the world seems to want, then I could rewrite not only my past, but my future.  Astounding.

wild soul

Freeing my creative soul

So I started to nurture my newly discovered introvert self.  I very tentatively started to allow myself to enjoy being who I was, rather than reprimanding myself for not being someone I wasn’t.  I tried to stop worrying about all the things I was not and focus on all the things I was.  Of course, this is easier said than done.  But what seemed to help me was the daily pursuit of a more creative way of life.

To document life in the farmhouse I had started a blog and this became my way of communicating my newly discovered introvert self to the outside world.  Using writing and photography I started expressing myself and sharing my journey online.  Later on in our housesitting adventures, I would learn to express myself through art, something I had sadly locked away for years but which thankfully resurfaced along with other creative pursuits as yet another important, and previously missing, piece of the puzzle.

Intuition as a guiding light

Trusting my intuition, although incredibly difficult at times, has become a guiding light on my journey.  If I had planned things out too much I would never have discovered my creative side as I have, because I would have been busy committing to those plans.  I still have a lot of problems trusting my intuition and tend always to look outward first even though I know that only I have the answers to the deep questions I ask myself.  But I’m slowly learning to take the lead in my own life.  Inhabiting my life with my creative, nature loving, introverted self rather than filling the role of onlooker in a life that appears alien to me.

Bit by bit the negative and fractious energy built around the person I thought I should be has dissolved and been replaced by a more positive, gentle, flowing energy that is built around who I truly am.  Some parts of me I am still shy to show to the world, but these things take time and if I continue to trust my intuition then I am sure everything will slot into place as and when it needs to.

The struggle of self-discovery

All of these new experiences and discoveries were not without struggle though.  My demons showed up time and time again in dark moods, self-doubt, fear, impatience and insomnia.  Try to imagine this wonderful farmhouse in rural France in the middle of winter when we have been living in a grey cloud for the past few weeks.  There is no dry wood for the fire and the wind is howling through the badly fitting doors and windows.  The boiler keeps blowing out so there is no hot water and we are sitting there in the kitchen with our demons wondering how long you can spend in such isolation before going completely insane.

wild soul

In dialogue with my demons

This part of my journey I was not prepared for.  But one by one as the demons showed up at the door, snarling at me in disgust, taunting me with their snide comments of ‘not good enough’, ‘failure’ and other such niceties, I invited them in and I sat with them.  Quietly hearing them out until they had no more to say and disappeared off, one by one, back into the mist.  I knew they would return but I felt like it would be ok.  For the first time in my life I had opened up a dialogue with my own mind and somewhere deep inside I knew this to be a turning point and something to learn from.  I am still learning, but I now know that once we let the light in and start to show up every day as our true selves, everything changes.

We never did go back to real life, whatever that is, like we sensibly thought we would after our one year sabbatical, now four years ago.  Our savings lasted longer than we thought and it was difficult to say no to other housesits.  A winter by the sea looking after a tiny hotel.  Another two winters looking after an 18th century château and the resident cat.  A summer in a city apartment in Copenhagen.

The way forward

I’m not sure what’s next and I’m not sure it really matters.  My life has changed from the inside out and although I know I’m not there yet, I’m certainly on my way to living a much more wholehearted life.  Letting go of what no longer serves me and focusing on what lights me up.  Most importantly though, I’m enjoying the journey. ♥

Key book companions along the way

The Fire Starter Sessions – Danielle LaPorte

The Creative Fire – Clarissa Pinkola Estes

Writing Down the Bones – Natalia Goldberg

The Power of Now – Eckhart Tolle

Women who Run with the Wolves – Clarissa Pinkola Estes

I Will Not Die an Unlived Life – Dawna Markova

Turning Pro – Steven Pressfield

The Big Leap – Gay Henricks

The Invitation / The Call / The Dance – Oriah Mountain Dreamer

About Elizabeth Milligan

Elizabeth is an aromatherapist and quiet creative.  She is currently redesigning her life and work around her own wholehearted values of creativity, positive interaction with nature, and slow and simple living.  You can find Elizabeth online at https://smashedmacarons.com or on Instagram Twitter and Pinterest.

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Creative and Connected #4 – the wholehearted edition

July 7, 2017

 

wholehearted

Inspiring resources to keep you creative and connected and an exciting wholehearted Quiet Writing guest posting opportunity!

Here’s a round up of what I’ve enjoyed and shared this week on various social platforms with a focus this week on being wholehearted in life and creativity.

One of the core concepts behind Quiet Writing is being wholehearted and having the self-leadership to connect with others and feel integrated within ourselves to achieve our creative goals.

This week, Creative and Connected explores this theme:

What is wholehearted? Why is it important? What are the factors in having a great life? How can we bring our whole selves to our careers and creative practices?

And there’s a special opportunity for you to share Your Wholehearted Story’ on Quiet Writing! Yes, I’m putting out a call for for guest bloggers – I’m looking for some special people to write for Quiet Writing about what being wholehearted means to you. More on this below but I’m very excited to be opening Quiet Writing up to our collective voices so we can share the living of a whole, creative and connected life in support of each other.

Podcasts on wholehearted living

The 3 Most Important Factors for Having a Great Life with Jonathan Fields

Jonathan Fields is a leader in helping people create meaningful, connected and happy lives. In this interview on Melyssa Griffin’s Pursuit with Purpose podcast, he shares his work across different careers including shifting from law into different directions that were more in line with his heart and what he wanted in life.

Key points for me were:

  • Jonathan’s core set of questions and metrics to consider when making a life change
  • The three areas of your life that determine whether or not you’ll have a fulfilled, happy life: connection, contribution and vitality – and suggestions for how to achieve these.

Elizabeth Dialto on The Wild Soul Woman

This fabulous podcast chat between Julie Parker and Elizabeth Dialto on The Priestess Podcast was so much fun. Elizabeth is the founder of Wild Soul Movement, author of Untame Yourself, and host of the popular Untame The Wild Soul Woman podcast.

This conversation is about how the Divine Feminine can mean all manner of things for women in being untamed including embracing less traditionally female archetypes. The podcast also explores some of the traditional roles that women play that can keep us in people pleasing mode and not embracing our fuller, wilder, more assertive soul within. Super enjoyable and an invitation to wholehearted divine feminine living!

Books and reading notes

Reading wise this week I started Tracy Chevalier’s At the Edge of the Orchard about a dysfunctional family of apple-growers in 19th century America.

Tracy Chevalier is a favourite author of mine. Her specialty is historical fiction and she has a wonderful way of taking a historical story and building on it with a fictional narrative. She is especially strong on creating a sense of place. ‘Girl with a Pearl Earring’ is probably her most famous book but my favourite is ‘Remarkable Creatures’ set in Lyme Regis in Dorset and based on the real life story of pioneering fossil hunter, Mary Anning.

Tracy Chevalier announced on Twitter this week that Remarkable Creatures is currently being made into a movie.

This is so exciting! When I read Remarkable Creatures it just begged to be made into a movie – it’s so evocative and visual and such a fabulous story. Plus if you love Lyme Regis, Dorset and fossils as I do, it’s just pure heaven. It’s a story of discovery, self-belief and strength, especially of female strength and courage, in the face of opposition.

Blog/Twitter/Instagram posts and interactions:

There have been some interesting blog posts on wholehearted living, being clear, moving through and understanding your personality type and its influence recently:

The only 3 things you need to live a good life explains Jonathan Field’s concept of how the joy of living can be seen in terms of three simple buckets: connection, contribution, and vitality. It’s easy to focus on and check in with, clear and remarkably helpful.

In Why your introversion doesn’t dictate your career path over on The Introvert Effect, Rebecca McFarland explains how being an introvert doesn’t limit you with your career paths and ways of working. You just need to learn to work it differently. Rebecca shares some fabulous tips for managing career and roles outside your comfortable energy zone.

In a great post on The Leadership Styles of Every Myers-Briggs® Personality Type, Susan Storm explores each MBTI type around the strengths and weaknesses of its unique leadership style. The key message?

Any type can be a leader, but every type is going to do it a little bit differently.

Insightful, thorough and grounded in practical experience, it’s a valuable reference for understanding leadership and personality type.

A post that spoke to me deeply this week was Nicole Cody’s Small Steps and a Pep Talk for Hard Days. It seems I’m not alone in finding this year to be a challenging one. Sometimes it’s hard to see that we are making progress. This post is a great reminder to pause and reflect on how far we’ve come. This is also a theme that popped up for me this week in my Tarot Narrative intuitive messages.

My own post on 10 Amazing Life Lessons from Swimming in the Sea was also really positively received in all sorts of ways which was so heartening. I loved writing this post on the many things that swimming in the sea has taught me this year. It’s been such a valuable learning experience in exercise, connection with community and feeling more whole through vitality and being coached by inspirational fit women buddies, Jeanette Buchanan and Samantha Wheatley.

sea swimming

An invitation to guest post on Quiet Writing on ‘My Wholehearted Story’

And now to an exciting opportunity to guest post on Quiet Writing!

Quiet Writing celebrates wholehearted living and writing, career and creativity.

But what does wholehearted mean to me – and you?

It’s a word I found coming out of my mouth in a negative sense firstly. About a year ago, I found myself saying, “I am just not feeling wholehearted any more.” And this sense started a deep search and a time of transition to a more wholehearted way of creating and living that is expressing itself in many ways. This is through Quiet Writing here, in my writing, in learning to be a Life Coach, in becoming certified in personality type assessment and in working more with intuitive tools such as tarot and oracle. And it’s also expressed in my developing work in coaching to support others who want to feel more creative and connected. And I am so loving all of this!

In the early stages of this transition journey, I listened to Elizabeth Gilbert’s Magic Lessons podcast “Who gets to decide if you’re a legitimate artist?‘ with poet, teacher, storyteller and artist, Mark Nepo. In discussing how to help Cecilia, a poet who has become marooned with writing because of not feeling good enough, being rejected and not being able to get into an MFA program, Mark offers her the word ‘wholehearted’ as advice and reads his beautiful poem:

Breaking Surface

Let no one keep you from your journey,
no rabbi or priest, no mother
who wants you to dig for treasures
she misplaced, no father
who won’t let one life be enough,
no lover who measures their worth
by what you might give up,
no voice that tells you in the night
it can’t be done.

Let nothing dissuade you
from seeing what you see
or feeling the winds that make you
want to dance alone
or go where no one
has yet to go.

You are the only explorer.
Your heart, the unreadable compass.
Your soul, the shore of a promise
too great to be ignored.

I listened to Mark reading this poem on the podcast again today and cried (again). It touches me so deeply and is what Quiet Writing is all about: letting no one keep us from our journey and being the creative explorer of our hearts.

So I’ve decided it’s time to hear more voices around wholehearted living and what it means to us here at Quiet Writing.

I am offering you the opportunity to consider guest posting here at Quiet Writing on ‘My Wholehearted Story’. Initially, I have six places on offer for 2017 – one per month to be featured here so that we can learn from each others’ journeys of the heart in this space.

I am hoping that we can also consider a regular or one-off publication or online magazine as well. I feel that there is a wealth of wholehearted stories to tap into to support us all, as source that we can add to and connect with over time.

wholehearted

What is ‘My Wholehearted Story’?

So here’s a summary of what I am thinking and what I am looking for:

What is wholehearted?

  • bringing your whole self to career and creative practice
  • not leaving parts of you, especially the creative, poetic, spiritual aspects, at the door, any door
  • being whole, being authentic, being light, being present
  • self-care and care of and connection with others
  • yin and yang, dark and light, strength and weakness, shadow explorations
  • living our unique passions, gifts and influences
  • being our body of work in the world

How does it connect with Quiet Writing?

Quiet Writing focuses on the core values of being

creative, intuitive, flowing, poetic and connected

It’s about the strength that comes from working steadily without fanfare in writing and other spheres to coalesce, create, influence and connect. And it’s about honouring the process as much as the product; the being, becoming and journey, as much as the arrival. It’s about the artistry behind closed doors and how it merges and weaves into that of everyday life.

This beautiful quote, from Irene Claremont de Castillejo, in the frontispiece to The Heart Aroused by David Whyte captures the feeling for me around this more soulful kind of living:

Only a few achieve the colossal task of holding together, without being split asunder, the clarity of their vision alongside an ability to take their place in a materialistic world. They are the modern heroes….Artists at least have a form within which they can hold their own conflicting opposites together. But there are some who have no recognised artistic form to serve this purpose, they are the artists of the living. To my mind these last are the supreme heroes in our soulless society.”

What might you write about?

I’m interested in the ways that you have strived to build all or any of these values – creative, flowing, intuitive, poetic and connected – into living more wholeheartedly. And how you have worked and written and created quietly to make this happen, behind the scenes, as a form of the art of the living.

I’m interested in guest blog posts and writing around these types of questions:

  • What makes you feel wholehearted and what does it mean to you?
  • What have your learnings been about being whole in heart and mind?
  • What tools, tips, practices, do you have for others?
  • Which intuitive tools, exercise, learning, skills or courses have made a significant difference for you?
  • How have you worked your strengths and weaknesses to blend and find wholeness?
  • What have been the challenges, the shadow journeys and how have you overcome them?
  • What fears have you faced and wrangled on the way and what have you learnt from this?
  • Which passions and loves come together to make you feel whole?
  • What have been the features of connecting to feeling more whole: rhythms, women’s voices, cycles, the journeys of others?
  • What have been your key influences: which book or other inspiration helped make sense of all this for you?
  • What aspects of your identity or personality journey have you worked through eg introversion, extraversion, understanding of your personality/MBTI type, your artistic or poetic self?
  • Which critical learnings about an aspect of your personality made all the difference in feeling whole and comfortable in your uniqueness?
  • What symbols, archetypes or natural cycles work for you and how do you work with them?
  • How have you practised self-leadership to feel more wholehearted?

As you can see, there are so many ways of looking at this concept of wholeheartedness and what makes us sing and be able to do our unique work in the world. I’d love to hear your story!

You would need to contribute:

  • a 2000 word (maximum) blog post draft to me a week in advance of an agreed date for publication
  • any suggested accompanying images and photos that you would like to include
  • a bio and accompanying photo

What are the benefits?

The benefits for you are:

  • being featured as a creative and connected voice in the Quiet Writing community
  • the opportunity to share your work, business, writing and learning
  • the opportunity to flex your writing muscles in new ways
  • the chance to reflect on your journey and experience in being wholehearted and share this
  • increased connection with like-minded others
  • the possibility of inclusion in a regular or one-off online publication if there is sufficient interest

The benefits for the Quiet Writing community are:

  • our voices coming together to celebrate being creative, flowing, intuitive, poetic and connected
  • sharing journeys to living more wholeheartedly so we can help each other to shine
  • feeling more connected with a community of like-minded people around creative living and blending this with career and other aspects of life
  • the opportunity for publishing as a collective of voices to help inspire others in wholehearted creative living

If you’re interested?

Initially, I have six guest blogging spots available for each remaining month of 2017. But I’m hoping that the response will be such that we can consider an ongoing ‘My Wholehearted Story’ feature each month or more regularly as well other ways to showcase our stories together.

If you are interested in one of these initial guest blogging spots, please contact me as soon as possible at terri@quietwriting.com with your immediate thoughts on what you would like to focus on for your piece.

I’ll provide more details on specifics following this but I’d love your initial thoughts and a sense of response.

Or feel free to provide any thoughts on the concept of ‘My Wholehearted Story’ in the comments or via email. I’d love to hear your thoughts and can’t wait to receive your responses!

wholehearted

Creative and Connected is a regular post each Friday – previous posts below. I hope you enjoy it. I would love any feedback via social media or comments and let me know what you are enjoying too.

Have a fabulous creative weekend!

Underwater swimming image via pexels.com

Keep in touch

Subscribe via email (see the link at the top and below) to make sure you receive updates from Quiet Writing and its passions in 2017. This includes MBTI developments, coaching, creativity and other connections to help express your unique voice in the world. My free ebook on the books that have shaped my story is coming soon for subscribers only – so sign up to be the first to receive it!

Quiet Writing is on Facebook – Please visit here and ‘Like’ to keep in touch and interact with the growing Quiet Writing community. There are regular posts on tarot, intuition, influence, passion, creativity, productivity, writing, voice, introversion and personality including Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI).

If you enjoyed this post, please share via your preferred social media channel – links are below.

You might also enjoy:

6 Inspiring Podcasts for Creatives and Book Lovers

Creative and Connected #3 – on self-care

Creative and Connected #2

Creative and Connected #1

Personality, story and Introverted Intuition

Shining a quiet light – working the gifts of introversion

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