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Breakdown to breakthrough – my wholehearted life

January 31, 2018

This guest post from Lynn Hanford-Day takes us on her journey from breakdown to breakthrough and finding new ways to connect and create a wholehearted life.

This is the sixth guest post in our Wholehearted Stories series on Quiet Writing. I invited readers to consider submitting a guest post on their wholehearted story. You can read more here – and I’m still keen for more contributors!

Quiet Writing celebrates self-leadership in wholehearted living and writing, career and creativity. This community of voices, with each of us telling our own story of what wholehearted living means, is a valuable and central part of this space. In this way, we can all feel connected on our various journeys and not feel so alone. Whilst there will always be unique differences, there are commonalities that we can all learn from and share to support each other.

I am honoured to have Lynn Hanford-Day as a ‘Wholehearted Stories’ contributor. My sincere thanks to Lynn for sharing her story and photographs and stunning artwork. Lynn’s wholehearted story tells of how she moved from burnout and a corporate HR career to working with sacred geometry and the divine feminine and crafting a multi-faceted career as artist, coach, facilitator and therapist working with women in transition and organisations going through change. Read on to find out more!

A heart attack of the soul

“You’re lucky. Some people have an actual heart attack, and some of them die” said a friend. His words really struck a chord in me. I may not have had a cardiac arrest yet I felt dead, lifeless, unable to function physically, psychologically, emotionally. My heart was still beating and that meant I was alive, apparently. I had flirted with burnout many times over previous years and had already read ‘The Joy of Burnout’ by Dina Glouberman three times. I had even done a retreat with her on the Greek island of Skyros for God’s sake!

But this was the big one. It is five years ago this January I woke up unable to move. I’d spent the previous three or four months feeling tired and by the time Christmas arrived, I felt utterly exhausted. I remember telling work colleagues I felt like I had run into a brick wall. I thought I needed a holiday and all would be well again. I never returned to my job as an HR Director, in fact, I didn’t work for another 18 months. During that time I gave up my job and I then had to sell my house because I ran out of money and following that I moved house four times in two years, thanks to the vaguery of the rental market here in the UK.

In January 2013 I was told I had severe clinical depression and chronic stress. I certainly had burnout of epic proportions. I spent three months in denial about this, and, paradoxically I began to recover when I accepted I was ill. Just doing the washing up was a major event. Even now I find it incredible that I didn’t realise I was ill and that I’d been suffering from insomnia for months. That swallowing Nytol tablets by the fistful and glugging chamomile tea at 4am to help me sleep wasn’t normal and didn’t work. I didn’t feel depressed, I felt exhausted and spent. It was my body that made the decision for me to stop working and force me to lay down. Most of the time I didn’t know if I was sinking or floating. Much of the time I felt I was in freefall, falling backwards down a deep, deep well, never knowing when I would land at the bottom. I was being given a lesson in the art of S-L-O-W. And even though I wasn’t busy on the outside I was very busy on the inside.

For me, burnout is about loss of heart. There was no heart attack, but I was turned to ash and I wasn’t even sure whether there were some embers glowing. My internal landscape was like those images after the forest fires in California, an apocalyptic scorched landscape. Both my Doctor and my Counsellor said that this had been coming for many years, and looking back on my life I can see the truth of that. They told me that recovery was possible, yet I wasn’t sure what would rise from those ashes.

Place, space and belonging

Sanctuary arrived in the form of a dear friend who had retired to Dingle on the west coast of Ireland. ’Come and stay’, she said, and so I did, for a week at a time every few weeks. And so began my love affair with Ireland. I discovered the magnificence of the mountains, the sea and the sky and how I loved the sound of the wind from the Atlantic gales. I stood on the clifftops and felt I could breathe. All that spaciousness in the landscape and the seascape gave me peace. And what a joy that no-one knew who I was. To the local folk, I was simply Lynn, and this was such a relief and a liberation as I no longer knew who the hell I was. In my dead and drowning energy I began to feel glimmers of life in Ireland, and I felt a belonging to a place that was missing in my other life. At some level the wildness of the land connected with the wildness in me.

An unlived life

In the slow months of recovery, as I made my way back from the descent into the underworld, I realised that I needed to change my life. I recognised my workaholism for what it was, the numbing of pain and unhappiness, and that for me to continue as before would be a massive act of self-harm, a suicide. I developed a curiosity about the divine feminine and the archetypes that lived in me, about mid-life transition, and what Jung calls the shadow life or the unlived life. I spent a lot of time exploring the transpersonal realm as I connected with my soul. At some point, the following poem arrived in my life and its message became my guiding star.

An unlived life

By Dawna Markova

I will not die an unlived life.

I will not live in fear

Of falling or catching fire.

I choose to inhabit my days,

To allow my living to open me,

To make me less afraid,

More accessible;

To loosen my heart

Until it becomes a wing,

A torch, a promise,

I choose to risk my significance,

To live so that which came to me as seed

Goes to the next as blossom,

And that which came to me as blossom,

Goes on as fruit.

The slowing down of life gave space to the whispers of my heart and soul and I began to seek synchronicities and to just say ‘Yes’ to new people and new experiences as they presented themselves to me.

On becoming an Artist

Very early in my illness, I found a class in meditative art, which I had never heard of, but it contained the word meditation so that meant it was good for me! In class, I kept drawing circles. Another source of peace that quietened the incessant chatter in my head were colouring books, long before they became so popular. I would colour mandalas and kaleidoscopic patterns for hours and my monkey mind would sleep, much like it did when standing on the cliffs at the edge of the world at Dunquin in Ireland. As I made peace with my body I became curious about sacred geometry and mandalas and looked for a class. I couldn’t find any so in 2014 I bought a book on sacred geometry and a pair of compasses and began to teach myself. This interest became a passion and drawing mandalas became my meditation.

Later in 2013, my creativity called for more nourishment so I looked for an art holiday in Ireland and what I found was an art therapy summer school at the Cork Institute which included a module on Carl Jung and mandalas. This really appealed as I had qualified as a psychotherapist in 2008 (I did my 4-year training whilst being a single mum and in a full-time job as an HR Director). Then, on a visit to my local art shop, I saw a poster for the Central St Martins Summer School in London. I found a one week course in Expressive Art, which sounded like you didn’t need to have any experience as I was seeking art for non-artists.

When I got there I wondered what on earth I had done! I was the second eldest in the room, the one person older than me was the teacher who was 72. The young woman next to me was 18 and waiting to get her exam results. I had never used an easel and had no idea how to set it up, much like doing battle with a deck chair. And then in September 2013, I heard of an online course by Flora Bowley in a ‘thing’ called intuitive art. A whole new world opened up as I was astonished to discover the quality of art courses that are available online.

Art was my salvation and brought me connection with my creativity and my intuition. Little did I know that these were my first steps towards becoming an artist. If someone had told me in 2013 that in 2015 I would be exhibiting and selling art, would have a website and take commissions I would have laughed. I hadn’t held a paintbrush since school and that was nearly 40 years ago. As for geometry, I hated that at school! Now my protractor is my friend. And during 2016 I took a 10-month teacher training with Chris Zydel in California in expressive and intuitive art, which I completed in February 2017.

Stepping into a new way of being

Art has sustained me through a transition into a very different life. As much as I tried to return to a full-time job in the corporate world, the universe was having none of it! Reluctantly, I formed my company and became self-employed and then, out of the blue, two weeks later, an old work colleague contacted me to ask what I was doing workwise. Within two weeks I was facilitating a team development programme which turned into an 18-month coaching assignment with eight people. I began taking personal clients for coaching and mentoring and using my training and experience as a psychotherapist and as a coach. I trained others in facilitation skills and group processes. And I took on consultancy contracts in Human Resources and change management.

This sounds easier than it was. As my health recovered I also suffered a significant deterioration in another direction. The sibling to depression is anxiety and during 2014 my declining bank account and constant uncertainty of the house rental market threw me into panic attacks. In an attempt to escape the anxiety I became desperate to get a permanent job in order to give myself a sense of security and safety. The constant stream of rejections made me feel even worse.

From breakdown to breakthrough

My body closed down, my heart turned to ash and catapulted me into a new life and a new way of being. I don’t recommend a catastrophic breakdown. Yet it is also true that for me breakdown was ultimately a breakthrough and I discovered I had an unknown talent and that turned out to be something I love. Claiming the title *artist* was a tricky one! As was wrestling with notions of identity and who I am in the world, letting go of an old self and an old identity. You know, it was a couple of years ago I stopped myself from buying yet another self-help book about how to change your life when I realized I have done that.

My life is radically different to how it was in 2012. I earn my living doing the type of work I want to do. I make a difference in the world by helping people change their lives. I have a hobby that keeps me sane and brings me enormous pleasure, and much to my delight people want to buy my art.

My wholehearted life

For me, the wholehearted life is the opposite of an unlived life. A wholehearted life brings fulfilment and contentment, an inner peace and when anxiety arises I know I am being given a message that I am out of alignment. I now pay attention to my physical, mental and emotional energy and I follow my heart in saying Yes and saying No. I have learned that saying Yes to the unexpected that shows up in life can bring the most amazing experiences, such as offering to write this guest blog post, which is another first for me. A wholehearted life isn’t necessarily easy and I have to beware old habits. In many ways it is about living a simple life, pleasure comes from being with friends and family, love is what really matters, and learning the art and act of self-compassion is a work in progress for me.

What next? As we enter 2018 I have chosen my word of the year to be Nourish. My mum died of pancreatic cancer on 2 November and death brings a renewed focus on life in the way that it always does. Grief and loss bring me to another transition and another opportunity to care for and nourish myself whilst I continue to shape my wholehearted life. I want to develop my mindfulness practice and train as a teacher of self-compassion. I want to be more consistent with my creative pursuits, to write and to paint, to hold more classes and workshops. I want to host my Renaissance Woman retreat which I couldn’t do as mum was dying. I want to develop my coaching practice and run more women’s groups. I want to feel the sun on my face and the warm water and soft sand on my toes.

Key book companions along the way

I Will Not Die an Unlived Life: Reclaiming passion and purpose by Dawna Markova

The Joy of Burnout: How the end of the world can be a new beginning by Dina Glouberman

About Lynn Hanford-Day

Lynn Hanford-Day is an artist, coach, facilitator and therapist working with women in transition and organisations going through change. She is especially interested in creativity and intuition, positive psychology and strengths, helping people to access and express their inner wisdom. She helps women discover clarity and confidence, path and purpose. Her art and more about her as a coach can be found at www.sacredintuitiveart.com. You can also connect with Lynn via Instagram and email lynn.hanford-day@sophrentos.com

Keep in touch + free ebook ’36 Books that Shaped my Story’

You might also enjoy my free 95-page ebook ’36 Books that Shaped my Story’ – all about wholehearted self-leadership, reading as creative influence and books to inspire your own journey.

Just pop your email address in the box to the right or below. You will receive the ebook straight away as well as updates and inspiring resources from Quiet Writing on personality type, coaching, creativity, writing, tarot, productivity and ways to express your unique voice in the world.

Quiet Writing is on Facebook and Instagram – keep in touch and interact with the growing Quiet Writing community. Look forward to connecting with you and inspiring your wholehearted story!

transition wholehearted stories work life

Embracing a creative life – a wholehearted story

December 30, 2017

This guest post from Jade Herriman is all about embracing a multipassionate, creative life as the key to more wholehearted living.

This is the fifth guest post in our Wholehearted Stories series on Quiet Writing. I invited readers to consider submitting a guest post on their wholehearted story. You can read more here – and I’m still keen for more contributors!

I am honoured to have Jade Herriman as a ‘Wholehearted Stories’ contributor. My sincere thanks to Jade for the contribution of her story and the photographs she shares from her work. Jade combines the creativity of art therapy with coaching to help people see themselves and their situation in new ways. Her wholehearted story tells of how she came to embrace the multiple dimensions of a creative life. It is a really valuable reflection piece as we end a busy year and many consider changes in their life for 2018. Read on to find out more!

Building and leaving a career

This is a story of building and leaving a career. It is the story of tasting burnout, choosing healing and moving toward a softer more creative life. Most importantly this story is not finished, it’s still being written.

These days I love the mystery and watching it unfold, without a firm and clear plan but rather trusting intuition and the accumulation of small choices to lead me somewhere new.

Over 15 years I worked hard in various jobs related to environmental management and sustainability. I had been keen on science and environmental issues since I was a kid and wanted to get in there and make a difference. From starting out after uni with no clue about how to apply for work and very little useful work experience to ending up in a senior role in a research organization managing large projects, I had a steady job with long-term career prospects. On the face of it, I was achieving what I had set out to do – so why was it feeling so hollow?

After a while, I began to feel sick of the professional mask required to work in these roles, the way that people came together to speak about work issues but often not what was in their hearts. I felt like the workshops I was running with professionals from different industries were sitting at a very surface level, all about the mind, but rarely about what mattered most to people. I longed to help facilitate more meaningful connection. I wanted to create spaces where people could be honest and share their hopes and fears as well as their competency and their ideas for work.

Over time I started to have a yearning to do something more creative. Our work was deeply creative in a sense – we were always designing and innovating, but I yearned to do something that involved the visual arts and making things. I started studying art therapy, part-time, on my weekends and days off, just in case one day I might find a way to use it.

Burnout helped me take the leap

I had always been quite competent but not very confident, terrified on the inside of all that was required of me, but reliable and seemingly calm. I liked doing well and getting lots done but at times the burden of what I was carrying felt too much, and I would eventually buckle under the weight of the stress.

Burnout was a hard teacher. Finally, I learnt that my body had limits and that I could not be in stress mode indefinitely without it affecting my ability to continue. Burnout taught me that downtime is important to balance the busy periods. It taught me that constant worry about the future is not helpful. It also taught me that I still exist without work, without a title, without ‘outputs’.

In art therapy, we often talk about the hero’s journey and the descent into the ‘nadir’. This is the challenging place at our lowest where we feel that part of us is dying a symbolic death – before our ascent back into the ordinary world refreshed, wiser and more enriched by the journey. Burnout was this for me – the worst fear realized and endured – the catalyst that helped me leave my job and past career and take baby steps in a new field.

Feeling my way as an art therapist and coach

When I decided to start my own business, I gave myself permission to try things to see what I liked. In some ways work for me had always been doing ‘what was needed’ or ‘what I had been asked to do’. This was a chance to ‘feel’ my way through life – what actually felt satisfying, enjoyable and absorbing. Without stress fuelling my actions, with time and space to do and not do, I was able to observe what tasks I was able to do joyfully without much effort.

I had to adjust my pace through the first year especially, as my body was still quite exhausted and recovering its energy. I dialled back my expectations and allowed myself to have days that weren’t very productive. More and more I listened to the quiet voice of my body and less to the fear-driven voice of my ego. It felt like Persephone, a popular archetype for the wounded healer, spending time periodically in the underworld before returning to the productive harvest of summer aboveground. I embraced yin and yang, light and dark, productivity and rest.

Starting again wasn’t always comfortable. It was a brand new area of work and rather than being an experienced practitioner, I was a beginner all over again. I had to adjust to no longer having big and fancy projects to talk about or other trappings that made my ego feel secure. I had to sit with grief, loss, self-doubt and feelings of failure that came up sometimes. A book that resonated with me especially at this time was Wild Creative by Tami Lynn Kent, a love song to a life lived intuitively and in tune with our physical selves.

Bringing together my passions and loves

What my new work brings me is a chance to sit with people in honesty and create a space where all feelings are welcome. In art therapy groups, we speak about all aspects of life – and there is often a bittersweet tone to the conversations, about loneliness, about challenges, about grief, loss, trauma and mental illness. But there is also joy, sweet playfulness, and heartfelt connection between participants. There are shifts and development for individuals on the most humble of levels that are also quite profound – as they stretch their windows of tolerance, as they develop confidence in themselves as a creative person, as they practice speaking and being listened to with respect. In coaching, clients navigate self-doubt as a step forward towards long-held dreams.

I love that my work involves art now – helping other people make friends with art, playing with art materials, attending client exhibitions, making art myself, facilitating spaces where people make art together and reflect on the insights it has for their lives.

It also involves design and creativity in terms of thinking of new workshops, new programs, new writing that might be helpful for my clients. I love problem-solving and brainstorming with my coaching clients. I love the way that each session draws on all that I have to offer and there is a requirement to be in the moment, fully absorbed and focused with that person, responding to the mood, situation, communication styles, needs and more of each client.

Embracing my scanner self and a meandering path

Another big part of the journey towards a more wholehearted life has been embracing the part of my personality that is enchanted with learning and novelty. After discovering Barbara Sher’s work on scanners (multipotentialites, multipassionates, renaissance folk), and especially her book Refuse to Choose, I have found it easier to be kind to myself about my moving passions. Beyond just kind, I also approach my multiple interests with more respect and curiosity. I look for underlying patterns between the things I am interested in and know that to be happy I must do what I love.

How wonderful when we can give ourselves permission to do what we love, and not be wracked with guilt about being ‘selfish’ because we realize that people doing what they love benefits us all.

I went on to train to become a coach with Barbara Sher. This was face-to-face training over five modules all held in Germany! Geez, that was a lesson in following my instincts to do what I love even if it ‘makes no sense’. Since then I have been honoured to work with amazing multipassionate people around the world as they take steps to bring their dream projects into being.

What this insight into my personality has mostly given me is lightness in holding onto whatever it is I’m working on now. So for example, while my creative life at the moment looks like being an art therapist and coach, I no longer define myself entirely by my roles. Instead, I give myself permission to always be learning about how I can contribute my skills in the world, and what configuration of work feels good to me. I know that this will change over time, and I am less attached to having a CV that ‘makes sense’ to others than I am committed to listening to my inner voice, my curiosity and my fascination to see what might be the next thing for me.

What is wholehearted to me?

Becoming more wholehearted has been about embracing my softer side, my fearful side, the side that needs rest and can’t always ‘produce’, my intuitive and heart connected side.

It has been about living through and beyond perfectionism, overwork and burnout. It has been about creating a more gentle and caring way of working that plays to my gifts not just my skills.

In some ways, it has been about letting go of control and being okay with not knowing how the river of my work and life will meander. As a keen gardener, I like to imagine my life as a creative garden, which might be replanted frequently and feature a different mix in the years to come. In part, being more wholehearted has also been about stepping back from work, and having it take up a smaller part of my life, and unhooking myself from the wheel of achievement as a primary driver.

Key book companions along the way

Wild Creative by Tami Lynn Kent

Refuse to Choose by Barbara Sher

Live the Life you Love and Stop Just Getting By by Barbara Sher

The Soul’s Palette: Drawing on art’s transformative powers for health and well-being by Cathy Malchiodi

Hidden Wholeness: The Journey Toward an Undivided Life by Parker J. Palmer

Change Anything: The New Science of Personal Success by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, David Maxfield, Ron McMillan and Al Switzler

About Jade Herriman

Jade Herriman (Dip TAT, BSc and MSocSci) is a creative business owner, art therapist, artist and certified Barbara Sher life coach based in the Inner West of Sydney. She loves using art therapy and coaching to help people see themselves and their situations in new ways, and helping others create, connect and work towards their dreams. For more information, go to www.jadeherriman.com or connect via Facebook, Instagram or Twitter.

Keep in touch + free ebook ’36 Books that Shaped my Story’

You might also enjoy my free 95-page ebook ’36 Books that Shaped my Story’ – all about wholehearted self-leadership, reading as creative influence and books to inspire your own journey.

Quiet Writing is on Facebook and Instagram – keep in touch and interact with the growing Quiet Writing community. Look forward to connecting with you and inspiring your wholehearted story!

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coaching creativity inspiration & influence

Pro Bono Life Coaching – an opportunity to shine!

May 18, 2017

At the centre of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.

Lao Tzu

UPDATE at February 2018: Pro Bono Life Coaching opportunities are now fully subscribed – thanks to those who have expressed interest. But do still read ahead about the launch of Quiet Writing Coaching and my background! You can go to Work with me to find out about current opportunities!

I’m so excited today to be officially launching Quiet Writing Coaching with a limited number of pro bono life coaching opportunities for women!

It’s hard to believe that it’s nearly four months since I started the Beautiful You Coaching Academy Life Coaching course and received my learning resources with the most gorgeous, handwritten welcome note from our lead trainer and CEO of Beautiful You, Julie Parker.

Since that time, I’ve been studying and practicing coaching and I’m now ready to commence offering pro bono life coaching. This marks the official commencement of my coaching practice in the world – something I have been planning now for over a year. And I’m very excited!

In this post I will share my journey to this point, explain what life coaching is and what this pro bono coaching opportunity offers. I also want to share what I bring to coaching and who I see myself best supporting.

My journey to coaching

My decision to gain skills and experience in coaching is linked to writing. Writing and coaching are twin skills that I want to weave together to form a new path in my life. Writing is my creative focus and raison d’être, an area of my life where I would like to do so much more. But teaching and supporting people to reach their potential, especially creatively, has also been an area I have engaged in deeply through-out my working life.

I’ve worked with coaches in the workplace especially in partnership as a leader to help support the growth of my teams. I’ve been a mentor and I’ve been mentored in my work roles. When I decided I need to start making a transition to a new way of living and working last year, I reached out to a coach to support me at a critical time. And this has made all the difference in shaping this time. Thanks to my desire to change and thanks to my wonderful coach.

And as part of my coaching journey through Beautiful You, I’ve been working with a buddy coach where we have shared powerful learning and coaching experiences mutually as we embark on this adventure. It’s challenging times as a I work on this journey; my beautiful mum is very unwell and I am supporting her which is an emotional journey. I don’t write so much about this here as it’s private. But I’ve worked on my self-care and wellbeing as I move through this time so I can be strong and well especially for my mum but also for myself and others in my life. I am now so much healthier and stronger after this short time – swimming in the ocean a few times a week and back to yoga classes twice a week. Thanks to my commitment to change and thanks to my wonderful coach. Here is a picture of me on the left with my gorgeous and inspiring coach buddy, Jeanette.

Photo credit to Emma Louise Newby @emmalouisenewby

What is life coaching?

So as you can see life coaching can be an incredible support as we move through times of change and make a path to those goals that are in our heart. Especially those long term goals we have held very close.

Life coaching provides a structured and goal oriented framework to help you achieve what you want in life. It draws from a variety of disciplines including psychology, sociology, personal development and social development. Life coaching helps you move from where you are to where you want to be through supported and guided goal-setting and action. Importantly, it’s not the same as therapy or counselling; it’s more future focused and action focused.

People who choose to work with life coaches come from a range of backgrounds and work on goals as diverse as:

making a positive career transition to a more fulfilling job or way of working
driving creative projects such as writing a book or starting a blog
becoming healthier, fitter and stronger
having positive and meaningful relationships
improving self-confidence and self-belief
creating energising and nourishing self-care routines
living an inspired and balanced life.

Life coaching can take place in person or via technology such as over the phone or via Skype or Zoom. It can take place with individuals, in groups or in workplaces.

What I bring to coaching and where I want to focus

I’m choosing to focus on career and creativity coaching and I bring to that: extensive experience in adult and vocational education; certification in MBTI/personality type assessment; and a passion for creativity, writing and books that drives everything I do.

You can learn more about me here.

With my experience in leadership and creativity, I am interested in how coaching can be a form of self-leadership. Just as we can lead others and take the lead in situations, the most important form of orchestrating leadership is how we take ourselves forward and bring the pieces of our lives together.

My introvert qualities help me work from writing as a strength and I believe everyone can shine in their own way. We just need to find the threads that pull our unique story together. That’s what I am keen to do with my coaching and writing work at Quiet Writing – to support people to find the threads of their story and shine.

And I’ve done the work. I’m finding the threads of my story and weaving them together too:

I’ve sat in cafes and on trains before work, writing and studying poetry, to tap into that source and learn more.
I’ve walked into work and felt like I’m leaving large parts of myself behind, the most important parts, and felt so sad about it. So I’m taking that feeling forward to plan a different future.
I’ve woven creativity into my day job as much as I could, especially as a leader of innovative practice. I’ve learnt from this but there’s still so much more I want to be doing.
I’ve listened to so many podcasts and read so many books! That will always be the way as I love learning. But it’s time for me to take these influences forward into my unique brand of coaching and writing work and live the life I want.

I’ve studied and worked and read and I’m keen to bring all these pieces together and find the gold threads and from there to make a new creatively based lifestyle.

It’s time for me to be more whole-hearted and coaching and writing are the keys to that. So I’m working through it all and I’m on the journey. And I’m keen to support you also on your journey to work on goals that bring more heart to what you do and what you want to do.

So how about you?

So if any of these thoughts and experiences about creativity and career, about self-leadership and feeling more whole-hearted, about doing the work, are resonating with you, I’d love to work with you.

I feel especially called to work with women who:

want to be more whole-hearted about the work they do; by this I mean, feeling more whole – like all of your important and valued parts are in play and activated, not left at the door or buried somewhere;
are trying to find their unique voice and space in their career and creative world;
have skills and experience they wish to take as a foundation and recast into a new vision and path;
want to take the steps to create the life they want and to shine.

I’d love to have a chat with you if you’d like to feel more satisfied with your life and make more informed choices about how to be creative and make a living. Or if you’re keen on getting your creative projects moving and are trying to work out how to combine creativity and career more effectively. These are areas I care so much about and can support you in.

My pro bono life coaching offering

So, I am so excited to be offering my first pro bono life coaching opportunities right now to a small number of women as I step into my future as a coach and a writer.

As a coach in training, my plan is to start with a number of limited pro bono opportunities now and focus on them for the next few months.

What I am offering now is:

the opportunity to work with me as your coach for a coaching series of 6 sessions over a 3 month period on areas that are important to you and your life path;
a 30 minute consultation upfront to start the process to ensure we are a positive fit and to identify areas of possible focus to ensure maximum value from our sessions. You will be asked to fill out a short questionnaire prior to this first discussion.

In return, and in lieu of any monetary exchange for this pro bono coaching series offering, you need to provide:

a (glowing) testimonial with a photo within one week of your coaching series finishing and
a shout out where you can about the great experience you have had with me as your coach.

Once we have the 30 minute consultation, we will identify the dates and schedule for our sessions so we can make them a priority once an hour each fortnight.

In practical terms, I’m in Australia but you can be anywhere in the world. We would work via technology based services like Skype for our sessions.

As you can see, it’s all about my learning, the benefit to you of a fabulous and productive coaching series with me and the opportunity for me to launch my coaching work as positively as I can, building on my current experience and yours. A super win-win!

Where to contact me:

So I hope you are excited by what this might mean for you!

If you are interested in being considered for this coaching opportunity, noting that they are small in number and only available for a limited time, please contact me:

via email: terri@quietwriting.com
or via direct message on social media – via Facebook or Instagram if we are already connected

I would love to work with you now or into the future in Quiet Writing Coaching!

Please feel free to share with anyone who you think might benefit from this opportunity.

Thought pieces

I usually finish my blog posts with thought pieces – related thoughts, symbols, references – being an intuitive with an associative mind, connections pop up and I like to include them here.

For today, it’s a tarot card – the beautiful Three of Earth – also known as the Three of Pentacles (Coins) from the recently released ‘The Good Tarot’ by Colette Baron-Reid.

I start my day with a tarot and oracle reading for guidance and sometimes I hesitate to do that first and feel I should get on with my work. Then I get the most helpful insights and the reminder from the cards that this is my work. The intuitive wisdom feeds deeply into my day and visions and what I can then share with others to inspire them.

Today’s question was about coaching, this pro bono coaching offer and how it fits with my vision and with yours.

So here is the beautiful Three of Earth:

How gorgeous are her butterfly glasses – transformative and seeing far into the future, grounded in the here and now, but lifting her gaze. Here are Colette Baron-Reid’s words on this card:

Teamwork, building on solid foundations, group efforts, dedicated collaboration

What I am building is grounded in a solid foundation, so I know I can trust it will not slip away suddenly. I am joined by others in coordinated efforts to bring forth what we have chosen to co-create. The architecture of my dreams is becoming tangible, taking shape before me, and I share my joy and pride with my partners and supporters. Teachers and students, we are all learning, growing, and building collaboratively.

It really is all about co-creation. My future and yours. Thank you for your support – it’s such a pleasure to learn, grow and build collaboratively with you. Let’s put on our butterfly glasses together and see our vision and shine!

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Intuition, writing and work: eight ways intuition can guide your creativity

May 5, 2017

“And you can keep flexing your intuition (because it’s like a muscle) to feel into the next right step.”

Danielle LaPorte, White Hot Truth

“Standing all this while
Makes me realise I am alive
And I won’t settle.”

Vera Blue, Settle

Intuitive night thoughts lead the way

I wake in the night with the words of the song, Settle, running through my head. It’s true, it’s hard to settle into a rhythm now with so much creativity and opportunity running around my head. And now these thoughts… I hop up to note them down as I know I won’t remember them in the morning.

The night thoughts connect up and there’s a triangle with three threads spinning a story about:

the lyrics of the song, Settle, linking to my swimming in the ocean, feeling alive amongst fish
the novel I’m reading ‘To the Sea’, by Christine Dibley about women and daughters, ancestry and relationships to the sea, featuring swimming as a central metaphor; and
movement, yoga and that sense of keeping moving right now amidst a touch of fog and uncertainty but with so many quiet lights of myself shining.

It’s interesting how things come together, in your life and in your mind. The synchronicity of choice, the noticing of this, the connections that you make, the influences that you choose and attract. If you’re paying attention, attuning to the energy and the signs, things come together, messages and a way of working with them emerge in your life.

The guiding hand of intuition

Intuition is a guiding force for me. It’s a dominant MBTI function and gift I’m learning to work with more. It’s one of my five Core Desired Feelings, defined as a result of working through The Desire Map.

It used to be just a vague sort of gut feeling, especially coming in a work context when something just didn’t feel right. But I know now it’s so much deeper. It’s how I want to feel as I work and write. I want it to be the engine of my writing, the heartbeat of my days’ rhythm, the light that guides me one step at a time, knowing the overall destination but with the journey itself as the real discovery.

It’s about feeling it as I go instead of thinking it all the time. Softening into it, being receptive and independent, organised but flexible, influenced by others but allowing my authentic voice and loves to combine and come through, clear and shining.

It’s knowing that my unique collation of experiences and expression may be exactly the ones to strike a light in another and trusting that. The learning I uncover can be shared to help others strike up their own special connections and spark of genius.

Knowing what to do next

I’m finding that I’m writing and working this way more now. For example, I’m finding that I’m reaching out to read what is right for me when I need it. The novel I’m currently reading, ‘To the Sea’, speaks of women, daughters, ancestry, movement and swimming as all these areas align to assume pivotal places in my life.

‘The Butterfly Hours’ on transforming memories into memoirs is a library book picked at random and opened recently at random. I find the perfect words about fiction and memoir writing there that have helped me delineate more clearly what I want to write and how.

Sure I chose these books because they are my interests but it’s about tuning into what I need to know or experience right now, sometimes let it work unknowingly.

It’s also about what I’m choosing to listen to and when to listen, to songs for example, and which ones, which random playlists and what they ignite, the words that run like a stream in the night fuelling creative thoughts.

It’s the podcasts or audiobooks I choose to listen to. Just yesterday, two podcasts acted as perfect counterpoints around the two themes of intuitive writing and intuitive working.

The first from Caroline Donahue’s The Secret Library Podcast was a conversation with Madelyn Kent about sense writing and building connection with body and movement as a way of opening up possibilities in writing. It was about being in movement in the body as a way of connecting with flow in writing and relaxing into new awareness. Deep and rich, I let its insightful messages wash over me as I listened.

The second from Sara Tasker’s Hashtag Authentic was a fabulous chat with Jen Carrington about creating the ideal work week. They talk honestly about being entrepreneurial breadwinners and how to create a work week that honours both self-care and productivity. They get work done in their own ways, following their body’s messages and their spirit and not buying into traditional work structures like measuring effort in hours spent. I felt so refreshed from listening to these women with their distinctive northern English accents talking so comfortably about breaking new ground and not settling for others’ definitions of how to work. They both create outstanding content and entrepreneurial work that supports others to shine from working intuitively with sense and feeling.

Intuition as a guide: Eight ways to work it

So it seems intuition can be a quiet guide in so many ways if we listen to its magic. Here are eight ways to work with intuition that I have discovered are working for me and some questions to prompt you into how to put it into practice. Granted there might be some thinking and sensing work in there too. But it’s not a brick wall, it’s a continuum, so shift to letting your intuition do the talking for a while and see what happens:

What to read next – What do you need to read now – is it fiction, non-fiction or a combination of both? What does your heart need – to rest with a book, to learn or to be inspired? What do you need to know? What do you want to feel? Are you limiting to yourself to just one book when you could be more spontaneous and read more randomly, picking up pieces of wisdom that way?
What to listen to and when – Do you need music right now or to hear the spoken work like a podcast? What are you tuning into? What do you need to be learning? What random playlist, podcast or subject is calling you or popping up consistently for your attention?
Which project to work on next – Of all the projects waving at you for your attention, which one can you work on now with ease and which will be harder? Which one feels right? Even though one might be harder, does that need to be done first even though you are not sure why?
When to move and how – Which form of physical exercise will get you moving in the right way to free you up? What environment will ignite your feelings and inspire you? Is it walking to the local cafe, being by the beach, wandering through the bush or walking around the city? Is it yoga, walking, running or cycling? What type of exercise might free up your writing eg free-writing, making a list or colouring in first?
How to structure your week to best reach your goals – Whether you have a day job or are self-employed, how can you manage your work week best to manage self-care and reach your goals? How can it be both enjoyable and productive? Is there anything you can do to find the creative space you need? Which days are best for which projects? How can you reach your goals in ways that work for you?
What rhythms can you bring into your life to support flow – When do you work best and how can you take advantage of that? How can exercise and movement help establish a rhythm you can take into other areas of your life? What time of day do you work best and how can you make the most of that? What about working with the moon and other cycles to facilitate a balance between receptivity and action?
What intuitive tools do you choose to help guide you – Which tarot or oracle decks or cards are speaking to you? What about lunar cycles, astrology, spirit guides or quotations that inspire you? How are you working with them and how can you harness their power more effectively?
Which rich combination of influences will come together to make you shine your most radiant light to help others along the way? Take the time to dream, journal, mind-map, brainstorm, draw, draft, blog, write a poem, to bring together connections for new insights and share them with others to inspire them.

Intuition, discovery and seeing anew

So taking these learnings and reflections, I weave a new narrative through an intuitive and creative work week.

Rebecca Campbell, in Rise, Sister, Rise, talks of needing to learn what her subtle mental, emotional and spiritual bodies needed:

…I have discovered that my subtle bodies most yearn for meaningful, flowing, physical movement where I can move and express myself freely. I find that my creations actually depend on it. As I allow my body to release and fluidly move it’s as if I am both strengthening my ability to be moved by my soul and unlocking wisdom within my spiritual body.

That is the case for me also and I feel the flow of: my arms stroking the water steadily and stronger; my breath acting as an anchor as I stretch into yin yoga moves; and words arriving at night and then shaping them into a rough draft in the daytime.

I feel the rhythm of what a new work week could look and feel like – how to balance my creative desires and serve others in the best way I can whilst also managing self-care and the all important care of special others.

I feel, I feel, I feel the rhythm of the sea, of movement, of words on a page calling me to a new sense of home and being settled.

It’s also about learning to balance this intuitive flow and be practical and of service:

writing in a way that reflects and expresses me but is helping and encouraging for others, not just self-focused;
managing my self-care so I can support the care of others and not fall over in the process; and
honouring the influence of others in informing and finding my own unique, creative path.

It’s not about abandoning goals. We need a roadmap, we need to set goals so we know our overall direction and the three most important things to do this quarter, this week to help us get there. But knowing we can be flexible in our creativity, not working so slavishly, can be immensely freeing.

As Danielle LaPorte says in ‘Wisdom is Paradoxical‘:

Have a vision and…Go with the flow.

The Knight of Wands card arrived this morning as my daily weather report and he captures the feeling perfectly. Via the Art of Life Tarot, this Knight reminds us:

“The real voyage of discovery lies not in finding new landscapes but in having new eyes.”

Thought Pieces and key references:

Books:
To the Sea – Christine Dibley
The Butterfly Hours: transforming memories into memoir – Patty Dann
An Abundant Life: Flourishing with the cycles of the moon, Dr Ezzie Spencer

Songs influencing post:
Settle – Vera Blue
Awake Me – Rosie Carney
Mercy – Duffy (this was for the movement part!)

Podcasts:
The Secret Library Podcast with Caroline Donahue (@thebookdr): #48 Madelyn Kent Unlocks Writers block within the Body, 27 April 2017
Hashtag Authentic with Sara Tasker (@meandorla): Podcast 14 Creating your ideal working week, with Jen Carrington, 3 May 2017

Blog posts:
The problem with consistency (aka the beautiful wabi sabiness of it all) – The Mojo Lab with Victoria Smith
The 3X3 Project – Week 10 – Crone Confidence with Diana Frajman

Feature image from Shutterstock.com and used with permission and thanks.

Keep in touch + read about the 36 books that shaped my story

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Building and leaving a career

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At the centre of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.

Lao Tzu

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Intuitive night thoughts lead the way

The guiding hand of intuition

Knowing what to do next

Intuition as a guide: Eight ways to work it

Intuition, discovery and seeing anew

Thought Pieces and key references:

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